Should You Stay Friends With An Ex?

Being friends with your ex is controversial when talking about dating dos and don'ts. Let's face facts: tin can you stay friends with your ex? Some say that your bond arose from a pure, innocent place and that you lot nonetheless share a ideal love. Many claim information technology is a myth and contend that such a relationship could be a barrier to finding another person.

When you have shared everything with your ex, it tin can exist difficult to abound apart as they meet someone else or go used to a new infinite between you. It is not easy to take a stand on such an opinionated issue. Exes cannot e'er be friends. We examine when and how exes can become friends in this article. Nosotros will also tell you when they shouldn't!

Can Yous Be Friends With An Ex?

Staying friends with an ex is a bit more than complicated than it seems. Ask yourself the post-obit questions when deciding if you should stay friends with your ex.

ane. Why Did You Suspension Upward?

Being friends with your ex may sound like the mature thing to do, simply it actually depends on the circumstances of your breakup. If you and your ex had an ugly breakup, being friends with them may not really be an pick.

An amicable breakdown may allow you lot and your ex to remain friends. If you both broke up just because your lives were going in different directions and if you have mutual respect for each other, information technology tin can blossom into a supportive friendship. But, beware – it'south a thin line between being friends and falling back into a relationship that you know won't work out.

If your partner hurt y'all in some mode or was unfaithful to you, information technology'southward best not to pursue a friendship with them.

ii. Why Practise You Want To Be Their Friend?

Why do you lot want to be friends with your ex? Is it because y'all're afraid of losing them in your life? Or is it because y'all're hoping to reignite the relationship? Information technology'southward important to know exactly why y'all want your ex to remain in your life as a friend.

If it'southward a ploy to go on them effectually and then you become another chance with them, it most probably will not work – unless you've both worked on the bug that led to your breakup. Also, both you lot and your ex will have to exist on the aforementioned page about getting dorsum together.

If you're agape of losing your ex from your life, you need to ask yourself why. The human relationship has already ended. For whatever reason, it merely didn't work out. You need to allow yourself and your ex to motility on.

iii. Will Information technology Affect Other People?

Sometimes, people stay friends with their ex considering they are both part of the aforementioned friend circle. You don't want your friends to have to pick sides, so you and your ex remain friends. This can be difficult because you volition know when your ex starts dating again. And sometimes, in that location volition be arguments between the two of you, and your friends may get caught in the crossfire.

4. Do You lot Have Kids?

If you accept kids with your ex, you absolutely demand to exist cordial with each other. You don't have to be friends, simply you lot will have to be on talking terms with each other. Coparenting tin can be difficult and require tons of advice between you two to brand it work. You will need to discuss parental responsibilities and your child's issues with your ex without bringing up past arguments.

five. Does Your Ex Want To Stay Friends With You?

So your ex pulled the "let's remain friends" carte du jour and now you are stuck seeing them at outings with your mutual friends. Call up that just considering your ex wants to stay friends with y'all does not mean you lot are obligated to indulge their asking. If you don't experience the demand to stay friends with your ex, only be honest. Information technology will serve you both well!

6. Were You Both Friends Before Dating?

Maybe you and your ex started out as friends. It was so good that you simply slipped into a relationship. Sure, the friendship you lot and your ex had may have been amazing, but consider the baggage that comes with a breakdown. In this case, trying to remain friends with your ex may merely be an attempt to turn back time and go dorsum to a past that does not exist anymore.

If you lot have decided to stay friends with your ex subsequently because all these factors, keep scrolling to find out the best way to go near it.

How To Exist Friends With An Ex

Staying friends is non every bit easy as it seems. It's best to set some ground rules to ensure you don't sideslip dorsum into former patterns of behavior and to protect yourself from getting hurt again. Some of these are listed below, but you can add more depending on your state of affairs.

  1. Hang Out In A Grouping: One of the best means to remain friends with your ex is to hang out with them forth with your mutual friends. The more, the merrier! This volition help you avoid any difficult one-on-one moments with your ex.
  2. Don't Bring Up The Past: If you want to stay friends with your ex, y'all will have to allow become of the past. You can't expect to remain, friends, when you lot cannot permit become of all the mistakes made in the relationship. If y'all both ever get in a disagreement or argument, don't dredge up things from when you lot both were in a relationship.
  3. Don't Exist Overly Friendly: It's one thing to exist friendly, and it'southward another to strength yourself into your ex'due south life. As much every bit you are their friend, you are as well their ex. So, there may be things your ex won't exist comfortable talking about with you. So, know when to take a footstep back and give them some privacy.
  4. Go along Your Emotions Under Command: When you lot're friends with an ex, it can difficult to watch them motility on and date other people. This tin atomic number 82 to jealousy and arguments. If yous actually want to remain friends with your ex, you demand to go along your emotions in check. You need to permit get of your ex completely and let them find their own happiness.
  5. Respect Their Privacy: It's alright to go along some things about your life individual from your ex, even if you both are still friends. Y'all may have shared everything with each other when you both were in a human relationship. But, now it'southward wiser to proceed some things to yourself. Extend the aforementioned courtesy to your ex too.

At present that you know how to stay friends with your ex, permit'southward check out some things that you lot demand to avoid doing.

What To Avoid When You're Friends With An Ex

  1. Watching your ex motility on tin can exist difficult. Yous may be their friend, but it's not your job to pass judgment on who they date. To an extent, you may never like anyone your ex dates, and so y'all may not exist the all-time judge in this state of affairs.
  2. Don't try to become their best friend. Being best friends involves telling each other your deepest, darkest secrets, calling each other at four a.one thousand., and knowing basically everything about each other. It sounds an awful lot like a relationship (minus the benefits). So, trying to be best friends with your ex is but asking for trouble.
  3. Don't try to play matchmaker with an ex. In a bid to show that y'all've moved on or that you are comfortable being friends with your ex, don't try to set them up with someone. If it goes well, yous may end up feeling jealous and insecure. If information technology ends desperately, your ex may arraign yous for setting them up for awkwardness or heartache. Therefore, it's meliorate to avoid playing matchmaker altogether.

Despite your best intentions, there may come up a point when you realize it'southward amend to cutting the string with an ex. Learn all about when you should finish beingness friends with an ex in the side by side section.

When Should You lot Cut Ties With An Ex?

  1. If You Were In An Abusive Relationship: If you verbally, emotionally, mentally, or physically driveling by an ex, it's best not to pursue friendship after the breakup. Cutting the cord and walk away. If your ex belittled your opinions, did non take y'all seriously, or played mind games with you, don't stay friends with them.
  2. If You Yet Have Feelings For Them Only They Don't: If you all the same accept feelings for your ex, it can be difficult to watch them move on from you. Information technology'due south all-time not to get on that gunkhole. It is much healthier for y'all to walk away than to put yourself through that pain.
  3. If Sex Is Your Matter, But Compatibility Isn't: Some people have neat sex simply are extremely incompatible with each other. If this is i of the reasons you and your ex broke upwardly, being friends with them may blur some boundaries. Some people go on existence friends with benefits with their ex, but this may not be a keen idea in the long run.

The only scenario in which you tin can reasonably stay friends with your ex is if you had an amicable breakup and you both are emotionally mature enough to handle the friendship. Otherwise, it is not always the best idea. And, information technology's alright to acknowledge that. You need to come to terms with the thought that yous and your ex accept to move on and not exist a part of each other'south lives. It can be hard because you lot've spent time and shared memories with them. But, sometimes, letting go is the all-time thing you can do.

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